Washed By The Water

Washed By The Water

by NeedToBreathe, Album: The Heat

Daddy was a preacher
She was his wife
Just tryin to make the world a little better
You know, shine a light
People started talking
Trying to hear their own voice
Those people tried to accuse my father
Said he made the wrong choice
Though it might be painful
You know that time will always tell
Those people have long since gone
My father never failed

Even when the rain falls
Even when the floods start rising
Even when the storm comes
I am washed by the water

Even when the Earth crumbles under my feet
Even when the ones I love turn around and crucify me
I won't never ever let you down
I won't fall
I won't fall
I won't fall as long as you're around me

Even when the rain falls
Even when the floods start rising
Even when the storm comes
I am washed by the water

*So, here is the story....I kinda love this song!  It speaks something to my soul that stirs so much emotion in me that I can't help but throw my hands up in the air & sing right along with it! Because, you know what?  Even when the rain falls... even when the floods start rising...even when the storm comes... I am washed by the water!  Amen!! 

I love that something as simple as a song on the radio can be God's way of saying to me "I see you, Amber".  The truth of the matter is this: My Daddy was a preacher & I know JUST what the author of this song is talking about. My family and I have in fact, "been crucified by the ones we love" .  It was horrific & nothing but evil! But...you know what? I'm still here! I'm still here, and I still believe with all my heart that God is good.  What my family lived through during those years "in the ministry" was nothing short of  pure Hell. On. Earth.   There is no other way to describe watching in horror as "Church Leaders" show up at your house on a sunny Saturday afternoon to "remove" your father from his ministry position in the Church  because some ugly lie was spread about him & it infected the whole congregation. All I saw from that scenario was that Christian "leaders" do and say some of the most awful, hurtful things to their very own!  The things I saw fellow Christians say and do....they were things that should NEVER be said or done! It was sad...it was heart wrenching...it was wrong, and it separated the lives and friendships of so many wonderful people who should have never been separated.  It's very hard for me to recall much of those days with "fond" memories, but thank God I have a few precious gems that made it through that fire! 

That's one of the hardest things I've struggled with throughout my walk with Christ. From the time I was a very little girl I saw the most wicked things done to my family at the hands of  "The Church", which made me not so fond of  "The Church" (or at least what I thought the Church was).  I saw my parents sacrifice so much of their lives for people who betrayed them & threw them out  like yesterday's garbage!  In the end it made me more than just a little bitter. I didn't understand it then, and I still don't understand it now. But, the one thing I do know is this:  What I witnessed during those times of  great sadness and suffering  was not  "The Church" .   That wasn't what Jesus called believers to do. Jesus doesn't hurt like that! Jesus doesn't turn around and crucify you when you don't expect it. Jesus doesn't betray like that!  

That's why I love that the message of this song is that  we can let those "storms" in our lives wash us....cleanse us...change us... uncover the beauty that's hiding under all the layers of pain! When I grew up and left home I had two choices I could make :  #1) Be done with Christians who seemed to do nothing but hurt each other, or #2) Believe that Jesus doesn't hurt like that, and search for that kind of  fellowship. I chose #2!  ;-) Praise God for His faithfulness!

I've decided to come out of the shadows a little, and open up about what is going on inside my head these days.  I've eluded to these thoughts quite a bit, but I don't want to be elusive anymore...I want to come right out and say more of what I'm thinking!  I know I need to be careful in how I portray my point of view though, which is why I have not always laid things out in black and white, and just said what was really on my mind. However, I'm on a quest to be authentic this year in regards to what I post on my blog.  Part of that desire to be "real" (or authentic) stems from my new found passion to seek out Jesus for who he really is...not who I was taught to think He is within the  walls of organized religion. But, let me be clear...this is my journey. What I say is mine & mine alone! I don't think you have to think the same things as me to be "right".  I won't crucify anyone for respectfully disagreeing with me either. There's enough room in this boat for everyone! So, sit back over the next couple of months and talk with me about what's on your mind & what in your heart.  I've got a lot of stuff swirling around in this head of mine & I'm about to let it out...carefully of course!